What the Fuck ever brownies
1 splash of baking powder
Enough flour to make as much cake as you want
Last of a tin of coco powder
Find some almonds? Yeah chop them up and throw them in
Some sugar, about half of the amount of flour.
Mix it in a bowl.
Melt that bit of butter you have left in the fridge. Pour it in.
Add eggs. Drop one on the cooker. Desperately try to scoop it up. Egg on hands. Despair. Add like 3 eggs.
Find a can of condensed milk in the cupboard. Add it slowly, stirring until thick batter is made.
Chop up a bar of chocolate. Chuck it in.
Find some super old mini marshmellows. Eat one. Still good, add them in.
Put some grease proof paper in to a tray. Attempt to fold it neatly. Fail.
Throw batter in. Realise pan is too big, pick up paper and float brownie batter to smaller tray.
Smear batter as flat as possible. Batter way to thick but too late now.
Pour some more condensed milk on top to try to counter batter thickness.
Put it in oven, set to about 160 oC because your oven incenerates all in it’s path.
Cook some pork underneath it because brownies are not dinner. Consider the possibility of pork brownies.
When it smells good take it out the oven and poke it with a chop stick. Not done, put it back and force self to wait.
Take out when done, attempt to eat lava brownie. Fail. Slink away with proper food and wait for them to cool.
Eat 3, declare success. Smear nutella on top because top is ugly.
Take picture, post recipe to internet. Act smug.
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